Just some thoughts, Ladies and Gentlemen. Right or wrong...just what I was feeling at the time. - S. Carter

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

The Top Five Deceptions That OFF Men Use

The battle of the sexes is a phenomenon that is as old as the ages. Men always complain about women doing certain things, and vice versa. At the bottom of the debate lies the fact that we will never fully understand each other, and I honestly believe that we aren't supposed to. It just is what it is.

Now, after arriving at work this morning and pouring my cup of coffee, I sat down to check my work e-mail account. In it was an interesting message from my friend about a blog she frequents called SingleBlackMale.org. The link she sent (http://www.singleblackmale.org/2010/09/01/women-fake-looks/)was for a post called "Top 5 Physical Appearance Deceptions Women Use." The article was funny, and the videos the author included gave good examples to back up his claims. From what I read, the article was written in fun, with no hard feelings. It is with this same spirit that I drafted my response...the ladies' version, if you will.

Now, before you read further, please understand that I'm not an angry woman - in fact, I'm far from it. I believe that the majority of men (and people) in general really are good. As with any group, there are a few who give the rest a bad name. My post calls attention to this group.

The SingleBlackMale.org calls the wearing of hair weaves, heels and girdles deceptive tactics women use to fool men, and make ourselves more attractive to them. I will admit to the heels and the occasional shaper (girdle just sounds like such a dirty word)! But what about men and their deception? While it's often less physical (although those drawn-on hairlines and Bigen-enhanced haircuts were never cute), they are still just as, nay, more deceptive than women.

#5 Naw, Baby, my cell phone battery died!

While we know it can and does happen, if your phone battery is ALWAYS dead or dying, it's time to either replace it, or be replaced.

#4 Naw, Baby, you know I make $xxx, xxxx a year!

While there may be an actual job, sometimes it's not what you make it out to be. Just because you work at that law firm, it doesn't make you an actual lawyer. Just because you work at that hospital, it doesn't make you a doctor. Just be honest...it'll make us respect you more. If there's not an actual job, keep it moving, Homie.

#3 Naw, Baby, I'm not cheating on you!

Women never respect a cheater. In all honesty, we'd respect men a lot more if, instead of cheating, they'd just opt to leave. No woman wants to be number two (three, four or five) in a man's life. There are always more fish in the sea, believe that.

#2 Naw, Baby, I'll never do it again!

In my Maury-watching days, I saw this man on the show more than a little bit. Honestly, I believe Maury is scripted, but if it isn't, and if I saw this man walking down the street, I'd want to give him a Louis Vuitton beat down, simply for putting his wife through this heartache. Seriously dude? You cheat on your wife, and tell her in front of the whole world?

#1 Naw, Baby, we only keep in contact because of the kid(s)!

While this is sometimes the case, most of the time it's not. If she's as terrible as you say she is, why are you still dealing with her on that level? Please refer back to #3 for the rest of this answer.


So there you have it. Neither gender has a monopoly on deception or truth telling. And the differences are what attract us to one another. Some exaggerations are harmless, and others aren't. That's why it's so imporant to observe and take the time to get to know the person you're choosing to be with. The hope is that once you know a person, and accept that person for who he or she is, the need for deception will be nonexistent.


Sunny said...

so many men are just like jodie. the sad part is, jodie finally got it together in his early 20's but these men i know, are mid 30's. i like singleblackman (thanks tandy) it is funny. and your blog compliments his very well

NJ B.A.P. said...

Thanks for the love, Sunny!

OFF guys like Jody have the "once mine, always mine" mentality. They think that because you once had feelings for them, that you'll always have feelings for them. Women like Jody's daughter's mom feed right into it. All I'm saying is, if he's moved on, you move on, too. If it doesn't work, stop trying to force it.

It took Jody nearly losing Yvette to make him realize what he REALLY wanted. I'm glad it didn't take him forever to figure it out.